I have begun to wonder what my purpose in life is, where this is all going. Have I already started to lose direction? My mind has been plagued by many thoughts and it is has become a constant struggle to stay optimistic and driven in my current environment. It was perfectly fine, until things changed.

It is no secret that I have started to feel very restless, but this new role that has been tasked to me, might very well be the straw that breaks the camel's back. I am faced with one dilemma too many as I have many things to consider. I can very well suck it up at the expense of my happiness, but for what? There is no light at the end of the tunnel and I do not see this leading anywhere. There is no passion and a goal to drive me. This is way out of my comfort zone and there is simply no incentive for me to put up with this level of discomfort.

I can accept failure and defeat, because when I get knocked around, I know I can pick myself up again and soldier on. However, this is a challenge I choose not to take up because I fail to see how it will benefit me, except cause me more misery.

I have a very good idea about what I want and I know exactly what I do not want. No matter how many nights I spend praying about what I should do, the peace of mind eludes me. I know what will restore the harmony and rid myself of this torture, and I am quite ready to take this step. Perhaps, it will all be clear tomorrow.