Three months have passed since I made the biggest step in my life. The hell that I am going through now is not as bad as people make it out to be, but there times that I start to doubt myself. I have not fully realized how much is really at stake because I have not had the time to sit down and think about the magnitude of the uncertainty that lies ahead.

Newton's first law of motion comes to mind, an object in motion tends to stay in motion and an object at rest tends to stay in rest unless acted upon by another force. This law pretty much describes my life right now.

I feel like I am losing myself sometimes. My mind is so saturated with theories, formulas, figures and even more figures, that there just does not seem to be enough space for anything else. Everyday, my mental capacity is being pushed to its brink, leaving me exhausted at the end of the day, and it will continue to get worse.

These days, I am no stranger to the feeling of despair and helplessness. Yet, I am strangely happy and I finally understand what it is like to be pursuing something I know I really want to do for the rest of my working life. This is it, and this is what it feels like. The only thing left to do now is to center myself and forge ahead.

I caught The Leap Years last night and I loved it. A movie with a hauntingly beautiful storyline revolving around love so strong, it knows no bounds. I used to hope and dream about that kind of love I thought I could never have and would have settled for something much less. But after many episodes of hurt and crushing disappointment, love found me.

It is incredible how the paths of two people, from two different parts of the world and two different backgrounds, can cross in the most unlikely of circumstances. When I first laid my eyes on him, I felt that there is something more but I brushed it aside. Little did I know, he felt the same and that the most amazing thing was about to happen... we fell in love. He is everything I had hoped for and so much more and he gave me the kind of love that I thought could only exist in my dreams. For the first time in my life, I feel almost complete.

It is even more incredible that we met while pursuing the same dreams and I am no longer alone in my journey because he is with me every step of the way. I cannot thank the Lord enough for giving me this amazing pillar of strength and support and I have never been happier.

I love you darling.