"Come out, come out wherever you are....." Oooh such a creepy tone... I caught the movie Hide and Seek with my baby yesterday. As a child, it used to be one of my favourite games, after watching the movie, not anymore... I thought it was pretty good with a twist towards the end. I left feeling very disturbed though, very very disturbed... Anything involving a child and violence upsets me. Go watch the movie and you'll see what I mean.

I was busy the whole of yesterday. Went for driving lessons, went for piano lessons, the rushed down to meet my babe, Nicole. I was in a fucked up mood as usual, talked to my b/f til my hp ran out of battery and I didn't have a spare one. I am so handicapped without my phone and Nicole was nice enough to lend me her phone til she has to leave. Always coming to my rescue hehehe:) I dunno what I'd do without her:) We went for a facial together. It wasn't planned but I felt like doing a facial there and then. I hardly go for facials anyway and I think I should start. I must say I'm very impressed with the service and the cost. It is one of those small beauty salons in Toa Payoh. Quite obscure unless you know about it by word of mouth. Definately going back there again... Contemplating on busting $400 on skincare and curling my hair... hmmm...

I met up with my colleagues and we went down to Balaclava. I was underdressed where everyone around me looked so gorgeous but I didn't care. Ending up drinking lots of red wine. My baby came down and looked for me. We were supposed to have a 'talk' but we didn't in the end. Since I was feeling a slight buzz, I was nicer to him than I meant to be hehehehe:) Headed down to Mdm Wong's after that, someone's bright idea. I'm sorry but that place sucks. Anyway, by then I was too high to notice that the music sucked... I had fun but I must seriously cut back on my drinking. I drink an equivalent to 1 bottle of red wine (or more) every 2 days for the past week. Can you imagine how many calories that amounts to? God... no wonder I am putting on weight. It's all that drinking... :( Unfortunately, good company always comes with a drink or two, make that many many drinks.

Moving on, I guess the reasons for all that quarrelling with my baby stems from the fact that I do not like being controlled. I'm weird, coz the more someone trys to exert control over my life, the more out of hand I get. And if I am given the freedom to do what I like, I behave. Sure he puts in 100% (or so he says) and he expects the same from me. I can't... I treasure my friends too much to meet them less often. I try to include him and all, so that he knows who I'm hanging out with and get to know them at the same time. This is to put him at ease... seems to be working so far. He came up with a solution to our problems, just not be so commited to each other and concentrate on being happy. We'll see how that works out. Things seem ok for now and I'm glad coz I have more things to worry about..

I had a talk with my piano teacher and she told me her best friends from primary school and secondary school are married. And that their husbands DO NOT allow them to keep in contact with ANY of their friends, whether male or female. They don't even get to see their families as often as they'd like. After marriage, the only life they know is work and then the husband and the children. She was sad she lost her best friends that way.

Can someone tell me... WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH THESE PEOPLE?

How can ANYONE be happy with such a marriage? It's like they're a prisoner to their marriage and that their sole purpose in this world right now is to please their husbands? Hello? There's more to life than that! I dunno what I'd do man, I'd wither and die inside. It's the kind of life that I do not want for myself in the future... That's why I'm so resistant when I think my b/f is trying to control me and tell me what to do... expecting 100% and all. I love him yes, but he has gotta understand he can't have ALL of me. I just hope all the quarrels will stop after this...