Where I am, spontaneity is best left for a life outside these prison walls. The decision to tag along for a joyride on the spur of the moment got me into trouble today. To cut a long story short, a group of us went out before 1530 without filling up a consent form and we got caught. Unfortunately so, by someone who will pursue this matter to the ends of the earth.
Pursue he did and each of us were each slapped with 5 weekend ops duties as well as do a tech brief. True, we did break a rule but I felt things were blown out of proportion. If anything, it is more like a power tussle to exert an authority over us, which we undermined. I honestly don't buy the cock and bull shit about being accountable for our safety and such. It is ironic that the one day I overlook a stupid rule, I get busted.
Given my position, I certainly do not seem to enjoy much privileges. I am not expecting special treatment but I have been shortchanged time and time again. In a stifling environment such as this, some things which I should brushed aside are just becoming more pronounced.
I got a temporary instructor change which is almost akin to starting over. I don't know what to make of it, except give it my best shot. Hopefully my best will be good enough.
My previous occupation taught me well. I am able to hide much of my feelings and I am feeling more alone than ever. Even God seems kinda distant now...